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29 December 2009 @ 11:05 am
Fictional TeeVee: Central East  
So there's this meme about fictional TV (not TV fiction) going around. I got it from havocthecat and her awesome Space Pirates! Show . These are the rules:

1. Ask and I'll assign you the basis of some show idea.
2. Create the characters you need, including the actors who'd play them. Photos optional but recommended.
3. Come up with a general synopsis of the premise.

Of course, I had to play, so havocthecat gave me Secret Agents.

So I present to you a t.v. series that no channel on earth could afford, but it would be awesome.



They operate out of a non-descript building on the grounds of the Pearl Harbor military base in Hawaii. Their primary mission is to bring down a powerful international crime boss, and to use their expertise to retrieve information from parts of Asia. And to kick a lot of ass along the way.

The Agency

Malania Soltan
(Shohreh Agladashloo)
Deputy Director. The boss. She came to the US as a teenager, fleeing with her parents from the Iranian Revolution. She has little patience for incompetence, but infinite patience to get just the right piece of intelligence. An analyst by training and experience, she worries over her field agents a great deal more than she shows.

Kimberlee Sullivan
(Rashida Jones)
The hacker. She could've gotten a six-digit salary in Silicon Valley -- she joined the Agency instead. She loves her job, a lot, loves the second-hand excitement of it and the thrill of breaking the unbreakable computer system. Also good with 'borrowing' satellites to give info to her people. Less good with hearing about her friends in danger.
(sidenote: I can't get over how adorable this picture is! Did you know that not only is her dad Quincy Jones, her mother is Peggy Lipton? I did not know that before yesterday.)

Sarah Ling-Baxter
(Ming-na Wen)
Supervisory senior field agent, Asia division. She reports to Soltan, and is in charge of the operation to gather evidence against Kenny Long. She was born in China, but her parents were scientists who defected when she was young. Married, she'd like to spend more time with her husband, stop traveling and maybe have a child, but not until Long is dead or behind bars, since he murdered her partner.

Ryan Kwan
(Donnie Yen)
Field agent. Infiltrator and chameleon. Maybe not as smooth as he thinks he is, but still really smooth. He was a student protester in Tiannanmen Square, and gained asylum in the US. But for someone who hates the leadership of China, he has no problem flirting with their operative, Yang. A consummate martial artist, he and Yang fight a lot and have sex a lot on missions where they meet. He and Michelle work as partners usually.


Michelle McRay
(Francoise Yip)
Field Agent. Can break into any security system anywhere. She was the only Asian child in all of South Dakota (or at least her neighborhood) for some of the most miserable two years of her young childhood, and it made her want to study her mother's culture in greater depth. She came to the Agency's attention through her kung fu -- she was a world champion when she was 19.


Rafe Santos
(Mark Dacascos)
Field agent. Born in Fresno, California, to mixed parents, he got involved in a Filipino gang and was recruited to the Agency in lieu of prison. Proficient in fighting and weapons. Currently undercover as a bodyguard to the Newmarks and trying to recruit Marie as an asset.

Daria Liszt
(Zoe Bell)
Field agent. She is cute and blonde and fearless. She is also fluent in Mandarin, Cantonese, and Japanese from her time as an ambassador's brat, so she is constantly underestimated by her targets.

Recurring characters


"Kenny" Long
(Chow Yun-fat)
Head of the Golden Lotus Shipping Co. The Agency believes he's been selling Chinese nuclear secrets to North Korea, and knows he's a weapons and drug smuggler in most of Southeast Asia, on top of his legitimate/legal business concerns.

Lena Shu Lien Long
(Michelle Yeoh)
Wife of Kenny Long. Born in Hawaii to Tawainese parents, she met her husband as a cocktail waitress in Honolulu. He was taken with her beauty and she was swept away by his charm and his money. It didn't take her long to realize he was a criminal, and though she still loves him, she also knows he needs to be taken down. She is friends with Sarah, who counts her as her best asset. She plays a dangerous game of pretending to be loyal, but passing on what info she can.

(Russell Wong)
Kenny Long's chief enforcer. Mysterious and deadly, he appears to enjoy both fighting and killing.

Commander Justin Baxter
(Michael Trucco)
Husband of Sarah. Former fighter pilot, and now posted to Naval Intelligence division at Pacific Command HQ. Although he's not a direct part of the hunt for Kenny Long, his organization tracks Long's ships and so Justin gives those tidbits to Sarah.

Yang Zi Chong
(Kelly Hu)
Member of Chinese Intelligence. Occasionally helps the team, but always follows her country's laws and orders. Except for the part about fraternizing with the enemy. Unless he's not her enemy, at all.

Nathaniel Newmark
(Cliff Simon)
Some say he's from South Africa, some say he was born in Hong Kong. But they do know he rose up inside the Jade Triad, taking control of it in a bloodbath. Ruthless, he's trying to move in on Golden Lotus' territory. Nobody's quite sure if he would be better or worse than Kenny Long.

Marie Newmark
(Kandyse McClure)
Partner in crime with her husband. She's the only person he seems to care about and trust. So far his trust has not been misplaced, and she helps to run his syndicate with a cool organizational eye. It may be she's working her own agenda, though.

In my quest to avoid ripping-off Alias, I think I made the t.v. version of every Hong Kong action flick known to mankind, instead. um, oops?

I'd kind of like to write this novel now, though.

ETA Tragically, a novel would deprive the world from listening to a conversation between Shohreh Agladashloo and Cliff Simon. *melts into goo at the thought of those voices*

The best part of this meme is definitely looking at pretty pictures!
(Deleted comment)
lizardbethlizardbeth_j on December 29th, 2009 10:29 pm (UTC)
It would be awesome.

I tag you with....

the employees of a restaurant (or bar)
rhienelleth: sydney and jackrhienelleth on December 29th, 2009 07:37 pm (UTC)
OMG, awesome! I would so totally watch this show! And also havocthecat's space pirate one (but then, I'm totally partial to space pirates. And spies.)

I want to play! :)
Havochavocthecat on December 29th, 2009 07:57 pm (UTC)
Hee, thank you! :)
lizardbeth: Sarah Connorlizardbeth_j on December 29th, 2009 10:31 pm (UTC)
I give you...

Steampunk Detective Agency!
rhienellethrhienelleth on December 29th, 2009 10:32 pm (UTC)
OMG, that is SO AWESOME it hurts!
Havochavocthecat on December 29th, 2009 07:56 pm (UTC)
You REALLY need to write this novel. I would flail and make grabby hands and I WOULD BUY IT IN A HEARTBEAT, because this would be totally awesome.
rhienelleth: azularhienelleth on December 29th, 2009 08:00 pm (UTC)
I second this! There is not enough spy!fiction out there that features badassery with lots of good female characters.

I'm trying to think....maybe there isn't ANY. This seems a very unfortunate lack.
Havoc: reading pre-raphaelitehavocthecat on December 29th, 2009 08:06 pm (UTC)
Niiiiice Azula icon there, by the way. Now I wish I hadn't gotten rid of my Katara in her Painted Lady icon. :)

The lack of spy fiction out there with lots of good female characters saddens me. As does the lack of spy fiction that features Dualla Kandyse as a crime lord.
rhienelleth: mord-sithrhienelleth on December 29th, 2009 08:17 pm (UTC)
Thank you! I have more, somewhere ah, here.

Huh. I never did do Katara, although I remember getting a bunch of screencaps for it.

Kandyse would make a most excellent crime lord. :)

I miss good spy tv. An Asian themed one with all kinds of hot martial artists would be even better. Someone should make this show. Or, you know. Write the book. *cough*
lizardbeth: Duallalizardbeth_j on December 29th, 2009 10:37 pm (UTC)
Wouldn't she make such a good crime lord? She's so gorgeous the usual assumption would be total trophy wife, but definitely could be the equal partner-in-crime. (Though I will confess she first came to mind, because she was born in South Africa, just as Cliff Simon was, so they could both be international and bad together.)

Heh, it's funny how I only came up with the bare bones of this last night, and now I'm all -- "yes, I could write this and sell it and then it would get optioned and made into a really kickass show/movie/whatever... " :)
lizardbeth: Baal eatinglizardbeth_j on December 29th, 2009 11:05 pm (UTC)
For something I came up with rather spur of the moment, I'm getting VERY enamored of it! I've been wondering what to do for an original project that would cater to my strengths and the spy/thriller genre would probably work pretty well, actually.

It's certainly fun to think about.

emmiere: Books!emmiere on December 29th, 2009 08:03 pm (UTC)

Your cast is fascinating and I'm now interested in finding out more about some of the actors I'm not familiar with on here.

Write it!
lizardbeth: Trucco - mine!lizardbeth_j on December 29th, 2009 08:28 pm (UTC)
The guy playing Sarah's husband is probably best known for his guest star tole on big Bang Theory....

*snicker* But I can give you some info, if you want.

Wouldn't it be awesomesauce? *sigh*
emmiereemmiere on December 29th, 2009 08:58 pm (UTC)
The guy playing Sarah's husband is probably best known for his guest star tole on big Bang Theory....


Well, I was wondering why I'd been spontaneously motivated to get a picture with him.

I'm sure IMDB can give me the detailed stuff, but if you have any particular recommendations, I will not say no. :D
lizardbeth: Trucco - mine!lizardbeth_j on December 29th, 2009 10:58 pm (UTC)
Anyone in particular?

Donnie Yen's done very little in the US. He's probably easiest to find in the Jet Li movie, "Hero". Which is a good movie, besides. I first fell in love with him knew who he was from the Iron Monkey films, which are silly (as many of these kung fu type movies tend to be) but he's awesome. A bit harder to find is Wing Chun, which is him and Michelle Yeoh kicking ass together in medieval China.

The thing that started my whole fascination were the tv movies, "Vanishing Son" that starred Russell Wong, like twenty years ago. He was so frakking DREAMY I still have my crush to this day. :)
Havochavocthecat on December 30th, 2009 06:48 pm (UTC)
I thought I was the only person who had ever seen the Vanishing Son movies!
lizardbeth: Sam-Barrettlizardbeth_j on December 30th, 2009 07:02 pm (UTC)
No, definitely not! And while I have no idea if they'd actually hold up today (since I haven't seen them in forever), I loved them a lot back when.
Havochavocthecat on December 30th, 2009 07:04 pm (UTC)
WGN aired them in the middle of the night here, and I stayed up SO LATE to watch them. I kind of wonder if they hold up now myself. I should see if they ever released them on DVD.
lizardbethlizardbeth_j on December 31st, 2009 01:21 am (UTC)
No DVD, it looks like. But I did find them all on YouTube! *g*

And running a search on Amazon brought up a movie with Russell Wong, Bai Ling, and Thomas Gibson, of all people. Omg, just the cover is lolarious!
safekh_aubisafekh_aubi on December 29th, 2009 11:37 pm (UTC)
I'm not even a big fan of spy-based stuff, but this sounds really interestings.

Never done aything like this before, but what the hell. Give me one.
lizardbeth: Connor and Katelizardbeth_j on December 29th, 2009 11:43 pm (UTC)
Add enough ass-kicking to anything and it gets interesting! (er, IMO)

I give you.... *thinks*

"Modern Day Robin Hood"
safekh_aubisafekh_aubi on December 29th, 2009 11:52 pm (UTC)
In my opinion too!

Oooh... *Starts brainstorming*
Merry F: dee sparringivanolix on December 30th, 2009 12:46 am (UTC)
OMG, you married Dee and Baal! Talk about smoking up the screen!

I would definitely watch this show, even being not a spy fan.
lizardbeth: Baal - Continuumlizardbeth_j on December 30th, 2009 01:00 am (UTC)
Dude, I know. It would be HOT. Actually the whole thing would be smoking hot. I also just want Cliff to play more villains on my t.v. screen.

Emily: BSG-Dee-sad closeupmalana on December 30th, 2009 12:49 am (UTC)
Oh! Cool. I wanna play!
lizardbeth: BSG- opera houselizardbeth_j on December 30th, 2009 12:54 am (UTC)
hm.. I'll give you...

A Family divided by the (US) Revolutionary War
Be cool, Gail. Be cool.: [bsg] sleeperamathela on December 30th, 2009 02:02 am (UTC)
OMG, this is *so* awesome. (Dee! ♥)

I want to play, too ;)
lizardbeth: Scullylizardbeth_j on December 30th, 2009 03:13 am (UTC)
Let's see..

a human-seeming alien on Earth, trying to find a way home
entertaining in a disturbing waylyssie on December 30th, 2009 04:26 am (UTC)
I AM STILL STUCK AT Dee/Ba'al. ALSO Ming-na/Trucco (she is so gooorgeous).
lizardbeth: Baallizardbeth_j on December 30th, 2009 05:00 am (UTC)
Partners-in-EVIL. It would be awesome. (I nearly made them father and daughter, but I think married works better)

Ming-Na/Trucco would sell me on the show even without the rest of it, even if they were cops or just suburban parents or something, I have to admit.
rodlox: Parkerrodlox on December 30th, 2009 07:47 am (UTC)
hm, Baal or the good doctor, which to root for? (sorry)

I rather like this show (is it airing yet? and if not, why not? don't tell me FOX and CBS aren't eyeing the potential ratings they'd gain from airing this series)

so much good data, so many perfect actors and actresses.

lizardbethlizardbeth_j on December 30th, 2009 08:29 am (UTC)
Airing on Showtime, Jan 2011. Yes. YOU HEARD IT HERE FIRST. (I wish)

hm.... I give you...

The Trojan War: the Series
rodlox: going to hugrodlox on January 17th, 2010 01:33 am (UTC)
sorry it took so long:

that was where my brain died.
♛ part-time maenad: bsg; happy ever afterradon_ on December 30th, 2009 07:50 am (UTC)
I'd totes watch this show, in a heartbeat. All my favorite Asian/Chinese actors! (can Daniel Henney guest star too?)
lizardbeth: Anders- Helolizardbeth_j on December 30th, 2009 08:21 am (UTC)
IT WOULD BE AWESOMESAUCE. But alas, never happen.

THe more the merrier, I say. I've been trying to decide what Jet Li should be for my Sweeps episodes, while I'm dreaming. :)
♛ part-time maenad: bsg; let's danceradon_ on December 30th, 2009 08:34 am (UTC)
If I had a TV network, I'd totes buy it. Else, it'd make a good movie trilogy.

I kinda want him to be part of the Chinese Intelligence who turns out to be actually working for Long. hahahaha. Obviously I've been watching too much Infernal Affairs. >
lizardbeth: Baallizardbeth_j on December 30th, 2009 09:08 am (UTC)
oh, yes, Kelly Hu's boss. I had thought of that. And OF COURSE he's in cahoots -- THAT IS HOW THESE THINGS WORK. How else did Long get nuclear secrets in the first place? bwahaha. and of course you know Donnie Yen is working for Long, too, or maybe China, because everyone always betrays everybody else.

But then I thought that might not give him enough opportunity to fight, and what the hell point is there to having Jet Li in your t.v. show unless he can fight someone? Right? :)
rodlox: going to hugrodlox on January 17th, 2010 01:32 am (UTC)
maybe that'll make the role more attractive to him (I don't know); giving him a role that doesn't do much fighting.
(Deleted comment)
lizardbeth: Duallalizardbeth_j on December 30th, 2009 07:06 pm (UTC)
We should all do novels and flood the market with awesomeness!
djkiwi2576djkiwi2576 on January 18th, 2010 07:58 pm (UTC)
So I got to Chow and I thought all this show is missing is Russell Wong and then I scrolled at what did I see...RUSSELL...ready for this premiere and to write fanfiction centered around Russell and an OC that looks a lot like me.
lizardbeth: Russell Wonglizardbeth_j on January 18th, 2010 09:12 pm (UTC)
*Laughs* AWESOME. I would die of squee if someone did Mary Sue fanfic of my show!

mmm... Russell. OF COURSE I had to put him in. *licks*

Alytenacious_err on January 18th, 2010 10:29 pm (UTC)
This sounds fantastic. :)
lizardbeth: Russell Wonglizardbeth_j on January 19th, 2010 05:21 am (UTC)

I'm very enamored of it!

lunatangleofthorns on January 21st, 2010 04:01 am (UTC)
But there SHOULD be TV versions of Hong Kong flicks. I feel like this is such a great twist on the traditional cops/spies drama and the setting would be fantastic.
lizardbeth: Russell Wonglizardbeth_j on January 21st, 2010 06:03 am (UTC)
aw thanks! it was just funny because I was trying so hard to avoid the whole "single ass-kicking spy chick like Alias" thing - so I knew I wanted a group and I wanted a bunch of Asian martial arts people, and then realized what I'd done instead. *g* But YES, we should have US t.v. versions of Hong Kong stuff. I miss martial arts shows that aren't for kids and also it is a terrible waste having Mark Dacascos on a stupid cooking show

added! I haven't actually done anything yet, but soon.