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28 March 2006 @ 02:57 pm
Fic: The Empty Glass  
BSG Vignette

Pairing: Helo/Sharon

For the stagesoflove "Exploration of a Relationship through the Five Senses", Prompt 1: Sight

Spoilers: LDYB2, with a few lines poached directly from the dialogue.

Disclaimer: Battlestar Galactica is copyright to people who are not me. This was written only because there's a big 'ol gap just begging to be filled, and I certainly didn't make any money from it.

WC: 520 words




He can only see her now. When she drops the phone, all he can do is look at her. The hard glass wall of her cage doesn't block his sight, even though sometimes he wishes it could.

She turns and walks away.

"Hey! Sharon! I love you!" He pounds on the glass, shouting, trying to make her turn toward him, "And I'm not giving up this frakkin' easy! Not after everything!" But she doesn't even hesitate, just stretches out on the cot and stares up at the ceiling.

He watches, hoping, praying, that she'll look at him. He wants a sign of some kind that she's still there. But she doesn't move.

For a moment, he remembers how she looked under the orange Caprican light -- beautiful and free. Even on this last trip with grief-shadowed eyes, she held his gaze. His eyes lingered on the light in her hair and how it warmed her skin. This hard bluish light of her cell makes her look pale and frosted, as if she is just waiting to die.

He can't bear to see anymore and leaves, too occupied to notice the absence of the usual hostile glances, as the crew have finally found something else to talk about.

Once upon a time, he was content to look at her. He was her ECO on the Raptor and her friend -- it had been enough just to watch her in the forward chair or across the card table. But not anymore.

Not that Sharon is Boomer anyway. He accepted that some time ago, even if no one else understands that he knows 'his' Sharon is someone else. He knows who she is -- he knows what she is. It doesn't matter. Or rather, it matters, but not in the way they think it should. He wants to shake them -- Roslin and Adama and everyone else -- shove their faces in Sharon's pain and demand that they take a good look at her and see. Just because she isn't human doesn't mean she isn't alive. That she doesn't feel.

But they don't want to see it. Because then they'd have to acknowledge that the toasters can be more than machines. They are the enemy, but they are also people.

He hopes he sees Sharon more clearly than the others, that he is able to look past reflexive fear to the reality of Sharon. She helped the humans because of him and because of Hera, and what had she received back? Distrust, hatred, fear, and a baby she believed had been murdered.

For an instant, he remembers tiny Hera gripping Sharon's finger, piercing loss sweeping through him. He clutches one of the struts and has to close his eyes, trying to push the image away. The only thing that helps is remembering Sharon with her face wet with rain and glimmering in the firelight.

They can get through this together, but never alone. He needs to find a way to help her see him again, and not Hera's innocent face every time she closes her eyes.

But how, if she won't even look at him or hear what he says? How can he touch a heart so broken, when she's wrapped herself beyond his reach?

He has to find a way. For her and for himself, but most of all, for them. If they fail each other, what hope does humanity have, if there is no promise of forgiveness and peace?

Part 2: the Buzzing of Bees
 
 
 
Mayhem Parvaraincitygirl on March 29th, 2006 01:01 am (UTC)
This is very nicely done. I like how you showed the physical manifestation of grief as well as the emotional.
lizardbeth: Helo Sharonlizardbeth_j on March 29th, 2006 10:28 pm (UTC)
thanks! more grief next week, sadly enough. :(
syrai aka syrainatorcharming_syrai on March 29th, 2006 02:17 am (UTC)
Oh, very emotional. I like your style and you're describing Helo's feelings and thoughts just like I would imagine he's feeling. Me likes.
lizardbeth: Helo Sharonlizardbeth_j on March 29th, 2006 10:35 pm (UTC)
Thank you! Helo wouldn't leave me alone after that episode, and this part definitely flowed out as if he was talking to me. Glad you liked it.
wildfire571 on March 29th, 2006 03:00 am (UTC)
This is lovely. The way you portray Helo's emotions and thoughts is wonderful. Very 'in' character. You also address the way characters on the show treat the cylons as inferior and the animosity Helo receives because of his love for Sharon.
lizardbeth: Helo Sharonlizardbeth_j on March 29th, 2006 10:50 pm (UTC)
thanks for the kind words! ;) And yeah, I did want to put in a little about his frustration with the others who just won't/can't see what he sees in Sharon. It's tough to be Helo, poor guy.
weissmanweissman on March 29th, 2006 12:12 pm (UTC)
OK now I am crying, off to get some choclate. Great piece on Helo's thought's. I look forward to the rest.

Bob

lizardbeth: Helo Sharonlizardbeth_j on March 29th, 2006 10:41 pm (UTC)

Sharon's up next week, so you might want to get an extra truffle egg or your other preferred chocolate yumminess to hold in reserve. Just sayin'... :D

Thanks for the comment!
weissmanweissman on March 30th, 2006 11:53 am (UTC)
Looking forward to it
Bob
The Proverbial Bull in a China Shop...: won't give upsabaceanbabe on March 29th, 2006 01:23 pm (UTC)
Beautiful job. Definitely in keeping with the "sight" prompt.

It doesn't matter. Or rather, it matters, but not in the way they think it should. He wants to shake them -- Roslin and Adama and everyone else -- shove their faces in Sharon's pain and demand that they take a good look at her and see.

That just sums up everything, right there.

I can't wait for the next piece. Thank you! :D
lizardbeth: Helo Sharonlizardbeth_j on March 29th, 2006 10:59 pm (UTC)
no, thank you! :)

Definitely in keeping with the "sight" prompt

heh, yeah, no kidding. I don't think I've used so many variations on the word in a piece this short, ever! It was an interesting exercise, and I'm glad it seems to have worked. Now on to next week's...

Great icon, btw! :D
The Proverbial Bull in a China Shop...: yay - by goalieannasabaceanbabe on March 30th, 2006 06:44 pm (UTC)
Great icon, btw!

Thank you! :D I wish I could get the lettering to be more crisp, but I think the grainy effect worked out pretty well...
Jeffrepr0b8 on March 30th, 2006 05:01 am (UTC)
The visuals are stunning, and I can see it all...

The only thing that helps is remembering Sharon with her face wet with rain and glimmering in the firelight.

You put the story in beautiful pictures...definitely a keeper! Thanks lizardbeth. :)
lizardbeth: Helo Sharonlizardbeth_j on March 31st, 2006 12:11 am (UTC)
you are ever so welcome!
betareject on April 12th, 2006 07:50 pm (UTC)
OMG I'm crying over here reading this. Its just so heartwrenching!! I dont' know who I feel more sad for Helo or Sharon *sobs* This is wonderfully done!! *waits eagerly for more*